Friday, July 23, 2004

One thing out of balance in my romantic relationship is that my computer is completely unlocked and open to interrogation, while my fiance's is shut down and his email program is locked when he is not using it. I have had some interesting email conversations with people that I know he has monitored. I don't want to have secrets so I don't bother putting a password on my system. Even if I did put a password on my system he is the type of guy to figure it out.

Our relationship has been going smoother but there is a part of me that feels this minor detail keeps us off balance . This does not mean I will snoop on his computer, even though I am certain that he does this on mine. I tend to want to correct the balance of power in other ways.

He has no idea that I feel this way so I am coming out of the closet on this one. The sad thing is it will never be corrected. And he will say he doesn't have anything to hide but I feel this is bullshit.

I think it is best to allow his freedom to converse to whomever he pleases on the internet, afterall it is how I met him when he was living with some other girl, but shouldn''t I also be able to converse without snooping eyes?

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